Edward Snowden Gabs With therockmom: Why I’m In Hong Kong

For my Hong Kong peeps, both near and far, we interrupt our regularly-scheduled blog on music and parenting for a rockmom exclusive!

Not since Jean Claude Van Damme washed up on our shores to resurrect his career has there been so much excitement about a new resident. Yes, I’m talking about Edward Snowden – a bona fide breaking news sensation, living for the moment right here in HK. He’s all ours! Meaning we don’t even have to manufacture some weak connection to the media star, like we did with that Jeremy Lin fellow.

The big question, of course, is out of all the places in the world he could have chosen, why Hong Kong? Well, lucky for you dear reader, when I queried Mr. Snowden I got not one, not five, not ten but TWELVE reasons why he’s in the SAR. So now, here, in his own words:

EDWARD SNOWDEN TELLS ALL – WHY I CHOSE HONG KONG

12. The weather, of course!

11. With my white loafers, Dunhill shirt and man purse, I fit right in with the mainland tourists.

10. On my Bucket List: fish balls, chickens’ feet, hot Asian babes.

9. Golden Harvest promised that Aaron Kwok would play me in the movie. Massive fan. MASSIVE.

8. Actually, I thought I was flying to Japan. Common Yankee Error.

7. Found out your McDonalds delivers, 24-7. Sweet.

6. (Deleted by NSA)

5. Tiny hotel room + extortionist prices + sweltering conditions = trip of a lifetime 🙂

4. Because your kung fu is better than their kung fu.*

3. To hell with freedom, Zeman just gave me a lifetime pass to Ocean Park!

2. A certain Wendi promised she’d meet me here. WDM, I’m still waiting, x

1. The enemy of my enemy pays soooo much better.

Get used to it!

Better get used to it, Eddie! (photo by therockmom)

*Snowden says props to The Lone Gunmen, you guys were right on.

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Posted on June 16, 2013, in politics, pop culture, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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