What ’80s Dress Are You?

Train of thought.

Listening to playlists built around travel themes – Texas, California, a Southern road trip – I realize I’ve never done an Australian music playlist. So many good bands I recall, popular, infamous and obscure. INXS, Paul Kelly, Divinyls, Eurogliders, Hoodoo Gurus, Models, The Church…

Now what was the name of the band that had the song in the cocktail party scene in Crocodile Dundee?

Hey there you with the sad face

Come up to my place

And live it up

I have to ask my husband, who answers immediately. Mental As Anything.

Remembrance of the party scene = recognition that the red dress Linda Koslowski (as journalist Sue Charlton) wore was so kick-ass*.

To have the confidence to wear that.

I did not, in the ‘80s. But if I had, that would be my ‘80s dress. Slinky and surprising.

What Google can do: ‘great dresses from 80s movies’.

7,290,000 results.

All those Pinterest Halloween costume ideas make me feel old. When my kids want to dress up like the ‘80s they usually go with the RUN-DMC look. My Adidas! Then, now, forever.

Brain works back to ‘80s dresses. A Top Five forms:

1. The downtown dress, Crocodile Dundee (Linda Koslowski)
2. DIY prom dress, Pretty in Pink (Molly Ringwald)
3. Like-a-virgin prom dress, Footloose (Lori Singer)
4. The backless, spaghetti-strap numbers, Scarface (Michelle Pfeiffer)
5. A-whore-at-the-opera red formal, Pretty Woman (Julia Roberts)

If I wrote for BuzzFeed, I’d tell you what your favorite dress says about the self-image you desire:

1. Self-assured but desperate for a little artistic cool cred. Attracted to Australians 😉
2. Strong, crafty and rebellious though drawn to moony, spineless men. Go figure.
3. You really, really want to be loved for your brain not your body. Good luck with that.
4. You, however, don’t mind being eye candy and you really don’t mind doing nose candy.
5. Purely aspirational. You believe in fairy tales and the transformative power of money.

I soundtrack my thoughts with Paul Kelly’s Greatest Hits and INXS’s The Swing.

And then I realize: Ah! I haven’t even gotten to Winona Ryder’s goth gown in Beetlejuice. Or Demi Moore’s trashy strapless pink postage stamp in St. Elmo’s Fire!!!

’80s Dresses!

(Demi wore those attitude glasses so well.)

I send a message

Hope it gets through

 

The train continues on the tracks…

*To something random and related. A man named Mark Kalan, who crewed on Crocodile Dundee, bought the red dress at auction and started a photography project. Calling it The Red Dress Project, Kalan aimed to photograph at least 100 women – of all ages, size 6-8 or under – in the dress for a gallery show and book.

Now where was I when this went down (and I was still a size 6)???